Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.