we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
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The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Fuck now we have to have sex
In a bet, need to win
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
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you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.