Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Pennsylvania (610)

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.

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  (610): Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol. http://tfl.nu/y192
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  We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots

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  (610): We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots http://tfl.nu/1mi3
  Replies (6) Good night (1378) Bad night (306)
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  Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative

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  (610): Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative http://tfl.nu/dzmt
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  Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?

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  (610): Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that? http://tfl.nu/63qi
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  porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.

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  (610): porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy. http://tfl.nu/gke1
  Replies (12) Good night (2184) Bad night (298)
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  There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"

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  (610): There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division" http://tfl.nu/egg0
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  One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...

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  And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.

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  (610): One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings... (610): And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually. http://tfl.nu/lwux
  Replies (3) Good night (1325) Bad night (287)
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  I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM

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  (610): I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM http://tfl.nu/hx9z
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  You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration

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  (610): You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration http://tfl.nu/k4dg
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  I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.

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  (610): I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them. http://tfl.nu/t18i
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  I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.

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  (610): I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA. http://tfl.nu/fhl1
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  Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means

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  (610): Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means http://tfl.nu/2dw5
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  Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom

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  (610): Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom http://tfl.nu/xyyz
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  Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.

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  Thats Poetry

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  (610): Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is. (919): Thats Poetry http://tfl.nu/gxmw
  Replies (7) Good night (738) Bad night (252)
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  first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over

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  (610): first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over http://tfl.nu/fqcy
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