dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick