the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time