Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot