It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.