How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....