I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off