Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York City (917)

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  (917): View more from New York City

  Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?

  (212): View more from New York

  Vagina

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  (917): Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type? (212): Vagina http://tfl.nu/du5r
  Replies (9) Good night (1802) Bad night (325)
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  (1-917): View more from New York City

  you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...

  (917): View more from New York City

  oh thats it?

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  (1-917): you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around... (917): oh thats it? http://tfl.nu/beq9
  Replies (7) Good night (4298) Bad night (323)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Um, that's called prostitution

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money

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  (917): Um, that's called prostitution (773): Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money http://tfl.nu/jjue
  Replies (4) Good night (2433) Bad night (323)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.

  (917): View more from New York City

  that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.

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  (917): sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride. (917): that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks. http://tfl.nu/bp4f
  Replies (3) Good night (1326) Bad night (322)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.

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  (917): I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home. http://tfl.nu/cetg
  Replies (3) Good night (1084) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  How was the rest of your night?

  (917): View more from New York City

  A little fuzzy and a lot naked.

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  (646): How was the rest of your night? (917): A little fuzzy and a lot naked. http://tfl.nu/r63c
  Replies (7) Good night (1933) Bad night (305)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I am lonely and I want to touch your beard

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  (917): I am lonely and I want to touch your beard http://tfl.nu/xi4z
  Replies (6) Good night (1261) Bad night (301) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.

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  (917): She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for. http://tfl.nu/k05b
  Replies (7) Good night (3217) Bad night (298) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv

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  (917): East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv http://tfl.nu/5gj0
  Replies (19) Good night (1001) Bad night (296) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I cockslap morals

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  (917): I cockslap morals http://tfl.nu/zqeh
  Replies (5) Good night (2782) Bad night (295) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks

  (917): View more from New York City

  this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed

  (917): View more from New York City

  he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?

  (718): View more from New York

  messed up. what color are the wings?

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  (917): last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks (917): this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed (917): he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF? (718): messed up. what color are the wings? http://tfl.nu/7ui0
  Replies (11) Good night (1858) Bad night (279)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.

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  (917): All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come. http://tfl.nu/y4z2
  Replies (3) Good night (858) Bad night (278) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Aren't all three of those the same though?

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  (917): There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it? (504): Aren't all three of those the same though? http://tfl.nu/bg7f
  Replies (2) Good night (772) Bad night (266)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard

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  (917): You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard http://tfl.nu/7qxy
  Replies (5) Good night (2436) Bad night (265) Order T-Shirt
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  (718): View more from New York

  i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite

  (917): View more from New York City

  get a pic

  (718): View more from New York

  i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that

  (917): View more from New York City

  i want ur life

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  (718): i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite (917): get a pic (718): i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that (917): i want ur life http://tfl.nu/sg3n
  Replies (25) Good night (2269) Bad night (263)