Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (925)

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  (925): View more from California

  She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.

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  (925): She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again. http://tfl.nu/nmj5
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  He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball

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  (925): He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball http://tfl.nu/qmmn
  Replies (43) Good night (663) Bad night (4661) Order T-Shirt
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  My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive

  (510): View more from California

  wats the point then?

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  (925): My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive (510): wats the point then? http://tfl.nu/1ckn
  Replies (30) Good night (541) Bad night (4549)
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  I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position

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  (925): I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position http://tfl.nu/2xnt
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  Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.

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  (925): Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit. http://tfl.nu/rw2b
  Replies (41) Good night (3713) Bad night (4252) Order T-Shirt
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  I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs

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  (925): I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs http://tfl.nu/k9ok
  Replies (13) Good night (648) Bad night (4043) Order T-Shirt
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  never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.

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  (925): never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont. http://tfl.nu/mow4
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  we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks

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  (925): we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks http://tfl.nu/odpi
  Replies (19) Good night (1526) Bad night (4013) Order T-Shirt
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  remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight

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  (925): remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight http://tfl.nu/zwys
  Replies (18) Good night (718) Bad night (3614) Order T-Shirt
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  I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(

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  (925): I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :( http://tfl.nu/pd8d
  Replies (26) Good night (487) Bad night (3549) Order T-Shirt
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  I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.

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  (925): I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts. http://tfl.nu/g61c
  Replies (8) Good night (904) Bad night (3350) Order T-Shirt
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  So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.

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  (925): So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid. http://tfl.nu/x26d
  Replies (19) Good night (2133) Bad night (3191)
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  GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.

  (1-925): View more from California

  Wtf it's a Friday night?

  (925): View more from California

  PRIORITIZE.

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  (925): GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007. (1-925): Wtf it's a Friday night? (925): PRIORITIZE. http://tfl.nu/9mpa
  Replies (20) Good night (1587) Bad night (2922)
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  i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them

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  (925): i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them http://tfl.nu/sgsu
  Replies (10) Good night (691) Bad night (2899) Order T-Shirt
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  He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."

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  (925): He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods." http://tfl.nu/7kxl
  Replies (17) Good night (749) Bad night (2872) Order T-Shirt