I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
its like you know when i get waxed
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.