i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
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Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
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I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..