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Last Night in Kentucky (270)

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.

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(270): I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk. http://tfl.nu/wgbm

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(270): View more from Kentucky

My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.

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(270): My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there. http://tfl.nu/pghu

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(270): View more from Kentucky

No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.

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(270): No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife. http://tfl.nu/ovxt

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I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?

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(270): I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today? http://tfl.nu/zwes

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Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.

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(270): Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil. http://tfl.nu/p6d2

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We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".

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(270): We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots". http://tfl.nu/6unx

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement

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(270): I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement http://tfl.nu/ql20

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Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.

(270): View more from Kentucky

No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.

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Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.

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(618): Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you. (270): No, that's okay. Don't worry about it. (618): Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway. http://tfl.nu/gcov

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(270): View more from Kentucky

Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.

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(270): Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer. http://tfl.nu/zy1n

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I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.

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(270): I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely. http://tfl.nu/i6l6

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(270): View more from Kentucky

truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.

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(270): truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around. http://tfl.nu/6rm8

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.

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I miss high conversations.

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Swinging. Is. Amazing.

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(270): I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high. (1-270): I miss high conversations. (270): Swinging. Is. Amazing. http://tfl.nu/qk9i

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no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake

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(270): no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake http://tfl.nu/nyba

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Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?

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(270): Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off? http://tfl.nu/sbu9

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(270): View more from Kentucky

You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."

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(270): You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money." http://tfl.nu/lp5j

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Last Night in Kentucky (270)

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