Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York (631)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made. http://tfl.nu/sjsx
  Replies (56) Good night (4030) Bad night (472) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list. http://tfl.nu/ispc
  Replies (23) Good night (691) Bad night (2316) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood http://tfl.nu/dhuu
  Replies (113) Good night (957) Bad night (6158) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die. http://tfl.nu/91t8
  Replies (23) Good night (487) Bad night (3771) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): did you know you can prarie-dog a fart?? http://tfl.nu/q6p3
  Replies (12) Good night (740) Bad night (1993) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever. http://tfl.nu/2wq0
  Replies (47) Good night (4628) Bad night (937) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis http://tfl.nu/a1d7
  Replies (22) Good night (744) Bad night (2995) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky. http://tfl.nu/xwxi
  Replies (8) Good night (519) Bad night (3164) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms... http://tfl.nu/vz7o
  Replies (27) Good night (1613) Bad night (2223) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory? http://tfl.nu/wpyo
  Replies (12) Good night (5575) Bad night (490) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson http://tfl.nu/hv6u
  Replies (27) Good night (661) Bad night (2552) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont http://tfl.nu/r9tg
  Replies (4) Good night (3524) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans. http://tfl.nu/f9ad
  Replies (74) Good night (3961) Bad night (1750) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came... http://tfl.nu/52j1
  Replies (11) Good night (768) Bad night (2925) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again. http://tfl.nu/84mk
  Replies (23) Good night (1025) Bad night (3822) Order T-Shirt