I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"