Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.