so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Dating After Heartbreak
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.