They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.