It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
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Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
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He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career