Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
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this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
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I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks