I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.