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I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
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