I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face