they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point