Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Texas (210)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie. http://tfl.nu/l6yr
  Replies (2) Good night (724) Bad night (358) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together! http://tfl.nu/bu70
  Replies (3) Good night (1082) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night. http://tfl.nu/v64u
  Replies (7) Good night (1149) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL http://tfl.nu/gpbu
  Replies (6) Good night (1768) Bad night (332) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  did you know gatorade and rum go really good together

  (1-210): View more from Texas

  Are you doing depressed science again

  (210): View more from Texas

  maybe

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): did you know gatorade and rum go really good together (1-210): Are you doing depressed science again (210): maybe http://tfl.nu/zjts
  Replies (4) Good night (716) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I want to own their dicks and all the attachments

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I want to own their dicks and all the attachments http://tfl.nu/6rti
  Replies (1) Good night (690) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that. http://tfl.nu/vntm
  Replies (12) Good night (1554) Bad night (301) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish http://tfl.nu/kpto
  Replies (10) Good night (876) Bad night (298) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course. http://tfl.nu/nbyi
  Replies (4) Good night (808) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  "But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): "But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!! http://tfl.nu/6byh
  Replies (3) Good night (1322) Bad night (264) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs. http://tfl.nu/dihg
  Replies (2) Good night (680) Bad night (259) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me... http://tfl.nu/0ufz
  Replies (5) Good night (929) Bad night (257) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often. http://tfl.nu/cowe
  Replies (14) Good night (778) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created http://tfl.nu/4ngz
  Replies (5) Good night (526) Bad night (246) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob. http://tfl.nu/g13n
  Replies (7) Good night (850) Bad night (239) Order T-Shirt