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Last Night in Illinois (217)

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Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people

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(217): Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people http://tfl.nu/d4g4

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you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...

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please don't ever take me to a strip club again...

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(217): you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals... (1-217): please don't ever take me to a strip club again... http://tfl.nu/2ds8

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You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"

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(217): You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket" http://tfl.nu/imu3

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he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.

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(217): he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school. http://tfl.nu/g6u7

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he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.

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(217): he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit. http://tfl.nu/3nc6

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In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.

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gotta love wednesdays

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(309): In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st. (217): gotta love wednesdays http://tfl.nu/3grc

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Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning

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didn't feel it. :)

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It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.

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wait what? so it's not in america?

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(217): Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning (1-217): didn't feel it. :) (217): It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't. (1-217): wait what? so it's not in america? http://tfl.nu/0q24

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you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot

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(217): you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot http://tfl.nu/time

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so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it

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(217): so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it http://tfl.nu/d9op

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Why is there a cactus in the microwave?

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Don't worry about it.

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(217): Why is there a cactus in the microwave? (1-217): Don't worry about it. http://tfl.nu/f5vn

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just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?

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(217): just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom? http://tfl.nu/rbqh

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So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy

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(217): So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy http://tfl.nu/9pzn

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some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens

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(217): some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens http://tfl.nu/oucj

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you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012

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(217): you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012 http://tfl.nu/jiqa

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Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.

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(217): Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation. http://tfl.nu/9spz

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Last Night in Illinois (217)

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