Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic