I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
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You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
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Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.