I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
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I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
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He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.