Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night