He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
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You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
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We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.