Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets