Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Pennsylvania (267)

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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.

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  (267): I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with. http://tfl.nu/vaw3
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!

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  (609): Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?! (267): This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room.. (609): AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?! http://tfl.nu/dtle
  Replies (37) Good night (611) Bad night (3461)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF

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  (267): he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment (267): HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF http://tfl.nu/xvhl
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug

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  (267): I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug http://tfl.nu/3mhw
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.

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  (267): Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees. http://tfl.nu/ugpg
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping

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  (267): that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping http://tfl.nu/gh69
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.

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  (267): Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome. http://tfl.nu/u178
  Replies (1) Good night (575) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."

  (716): View more from New York

  lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.

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  (267): Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious." (716): lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus. http://tfl.nu/bbah
  Replies (4) Good night (570) Bad night (1825)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  wow.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  yeah, it was that bad.

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  (215): i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me" (267): wow. (215): yeah, it was that bad. http://tfl.nu/hwqj
  Replies (18) Good night (565) Bad night (4187)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.

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  (267): i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing. (215): the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?. http://tfl.nu/zmpd
  Replies (23) Good night (563) Bad night (2180)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.

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  (215): She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz" (267): So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning. (215): Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again. http://tfl.nu/rcrj
  Replies (28) Good night (545) Bad night (3036)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...

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  (267): she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling... http://tfl.nu/2dyo
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram

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  (267): worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram http://tfl.nu/sbpo
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?

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  (267): A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices? http://tfl.nu/eop4
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.

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  (267): In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/c22r
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