Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy