its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.