i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
