Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Follow @tfln