We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth