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They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
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