Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America