If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.