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Last Night in Illinois (708)

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just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..

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(708): just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car.. http://tfl.nu/c49r

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Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis

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Just arrived at our party

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(708): Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis (773): Just arrived at our party http://tfl.nu/7hao

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That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!

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(708): That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed! http://tfl.nu/bhfj

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Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.

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(708): Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life. http://tfl.nu/mhw6

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Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.

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We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?

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(708): Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning. (773): We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we? http://tfl.nu/hntu

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he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.

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(708): he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay. http://tfl.nu/sfnl

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I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality

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(708): I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality http://tfl.nu/1jam

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is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro

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yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.

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how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?

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(708): is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro (773): yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house. (708): how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience? http://tfl.nu/hgr9

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what are we doing this weekend?

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I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.

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(708): what are we doing this weekend? (1-708): I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store. http://tfl.nu/uvwp

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seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor

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(708): seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor http://tfl.nu/2ux6

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Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.

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(708): Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover. http://tfl.nu/rh7v

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Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!

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(708): Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player! http://tfl.nu/3jxt

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I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.

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(708): I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving. http://tfl.nu/rym8

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I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.

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(708): I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk. http://tfl.nu/8bkp

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Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...

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(708): Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked... http://tfl.nu/0j0c

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Last Night in Illinois (708)

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