I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.