Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH