Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk