and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.