I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
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2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.