Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York (914)

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  (914): View more from New York

  Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.

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  (914): Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people. http://tfl.nu/31i5
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  omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch

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  (914): omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch http://tfl.nu/rn4k
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  Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.

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  (914): Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective. http://tfl.nu/41o9
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  (914): View more from New York

  im gay

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  i know

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  yea but for you.

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  (914): im gay (203): i know (914): yea but for you. http://tfl.nu/jbuy
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  on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?

  (914): View more from New York

  11

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  (561): on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left? (914): 11 http://tfl.nu/ned2
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  this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.

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  (914): this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again. http://tfl.nu/zwji
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  i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty

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  (914): i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty http://tfl.nu/qv38
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  I faked an abortion last night.

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  (914): I faked an abortion last night. http://tfl.nu/q8tt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?

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  (914): Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business? http://tfl.nu/3lau
  Replies (36) Good night (572) Bad night (826)
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  oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.

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  (914): oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress. http://tfl.nu/z9ci
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  Did I miss anything?

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  A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.

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  so we also did drugs

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  (914): Did I miss anything? (1-914): A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson. (914): so we also did drugs http://tfl.nu/07bb
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  No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.

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  (914): No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay. http://tfl.nu/14mn
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  i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"

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  (914): i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie" http://tfl.nu/2g0i
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin

  (914): View more from New York

  and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston

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  (201): you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin (914): and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston http://tfl.nu/bnxc
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  (914): View more from New York

  Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.

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  (914): Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way. http://tfl.nu/3diq
  Replies (49) Good night (3725) Bad night (1157)