Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him