I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.