Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
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Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.